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Resentment City, Here I Come…

Sober Mommies Resentment City Here I ComeI had a moment the other day at work that sent me realing into a resentment spiral. As I was pondering my friends pallett for her hallway on my break, and my gay boyfriend’s excitement about painting, my thoughts wandered to another friend who is moving shortly. She is spending her weekends doing yardwork at her new home in preparation of moving in.

What’s wrong with this picture?  Both friends are renters. One is painting “her” hallway, and will likely end up putting a fresh coat of paint on the whole interior. The other hasn’t even moved in yet and is clearing the landscaping of her new “home”.

What really gets under my skin is that both of these women are doing this on their own time, and with their own money. They are sprucing up someone else’s property for free. Its ridiculous.

From there, I presume they both think they are at the advantage, because they can choose their own decor and prune just as they want.

Now the landscaper is an educated woman. She should know better. She hasn’t even moved into this house, and she doesn’t even own it, and she is devoting her time to clearing the yard of debris so that when she moves in its ready. THIS IS THE LANDLORD’S RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!!!! She actually joked that if I hadn’t been busy last Saturday she would have kidnapped me to go do yard work with her. Are you fucking kidding me? I don’t work for free, and I sure as fuck  don’t do other people’s work for free. She is so fucking stupid.

The painter is a classic people pleaser who says things like “I have to talk to my husband about it, because he ‘doesn’t ask the right questions.” How about strapping on a fucking set of balls and calling the fucking landlord yourself? And this landlord wants another security deposit out of her because she is signing a new lease as the home is recovering from potential foreclosure. Why you ask? She doesn’t know. And neither does her husband. But they’re going to paint the hallway because of the wear and tear of having lived there for years. And they will not be reimbursed. But boy, they sure are excited aboout spending money they don’t have to rehab a house they don’t own, because she can pick her colors. Did I mention their car just got repossessed? Yeah, they’re swimming in cash to spend on someone else’s property.

And you know what else? They’re driving another car thats not legally inspected. They paid some guy in an illicit transaction to place a stolen inspection sticker on their car. They are so fucking irresponsible.

The friend that facilitated the fake inspection sticker just moved into his own place after crashing on my couch a few weeks. He’s got four kids and is starting his own business. He had to borrow money for the 1st/last at his new place, but he can’t work a real job, he needs to start his own business. Steady 40 hour work weeks with health benefits is a big NO-NO when you’re fraudulently collecting social security for an illness you recovered from four yrs ago.

And thats my tax dollars at work. Idiots. I’m surrounded by fucking morons who cheat the system and let the system cheat them.

And these people are all FUCKING SOBER!

Wait a minute….

None of this is any of my business. None of this affects my life. None of this has any bearing on my world AT ALL!

So now I am sitting in my car smoking, amazed at the energy and visceral hatred that has just swirled thru my head. I literally hate everyone, and its none of my business. I swear I am spiritually fit, and a recovered alcoholic, so this tyrade between my ears is so foreign I am shocked. I can’t believe how much I want to stab these people for being fucking ridiculous. And it’s none of my business. It’s none of my business.

I go back to my desk, painfully aware that no matter how long I stay sober, I am still capable of revisiting my old  thinking process and pointing my finger at the world. The difference? I know today that when I do this,  there are also three fingers pointing back at me.

 
 
 
This post was submitted by Anonymous.

One Comment on “Resentment City, Here I Come…

  1. I can get pretty damn irate over things that are none of my business, too! How does the world not function the way I would have it do so? My sponsor recently gave me a hula hoop for my 6 month anniversary. She told me that everything in it, when I am in it, is my business and the rest is not. So when I wander and get annoyed at things, she tells me to get in my hula hoop, and damn, if that doesn’t work!

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